I spent the day with Bob at his therapies. It is always incredible to see how far he has progressed in a short time as well as sobering to see just how much further he needs to go to reach baseline.
We started the day with speech therapy and Ashley and Alyssa. Bob worked on word association where he was given three words and asked to recall one word that associates all three. For example: branch, leaves, roots. That one is tree. Easy, right? Nope.
“tall, city, building”. I cried foul. We have no frame of reference as we are country mice. It took ME a minute to come up with skyscraper.
“white, mouth, chew”. Bob said horseradish. I say he gets credit. It’s white. And you chew it in your mouth. His caseworker, Trisha, later on in the day said “gum”. The “correct” answer was teeth. Don’t let me lead you astray. He did an amazing job with all of the other ones he was given. So well that we moved on to another game.
The next one was called “Rhyme Out”. You were given three clues and asked to produce three rhyming words that matched the clues. Example: A home. A rodent. A girl’s dressy shirt. (house, mouse, blouse). This task was pretty tricky, but we were able to do it with a little help. By we, I mean me too. I had to stifle my highly competitive side because I REALLY wanted to blurt out answers.
The best part of my day was next. ORANGE. TAG. Bob is no longer a member of the red tag club. WE CAN LEAVE THE FLOOR! This means cafeteria for music. This means 6th floor for outdoors and movie nights. This is a step towards independence. I was trained and my name is on the board to be able to wander around the building with Bob. So. Exciting.
So as soon as that tag was secured, we high tailed it to the elevator. We wandered the 6th floor gardens and therapy rooms. He remembered that he had visited the roof yesterday and had counted the American flags on the tops of the buildings. I had never noticed them before. And I was super thrilled that he remembered something new for 24 hours!
Bob was very impressed with the decision Suzie and I made to send him to Magee. He said he wouldn’t know where to send me if the roles were reversed. I said, “Simple. Decision has already been made. Send me to Magee”.
During PT with Brent and Ranit, Bob worked on shifting his weight from side to side to tap his foot out in front of himself on a blue circle and then a low stool. Both the hubs and I commented on how amazing the mechanics are of walking. We all take it for granted because we just “do it”. But you have to shift your weight to one leg to be able to lift the other and place it in the direction you want to go. And back and forth. Incredible. And then Bob walked around the gym. Literally. The ENTIRE gym. Just holding hands with Brent and Ranit. He is improving physically at an amazing rate.
First walk of the day. I had to jump out of the way and he kept going.
At the end of this next video you hear me say “there’s not much further to go” but he did. In a huge circle all around the gym.
We parted ways for lunch and I listened to a musical performance while I ate and chatted with my stalker friend, Keith. He just wanted to check on me and is going to come and see Bob and I the next time I am there for a day.
The next hour or so was pretty fun. I gave Bob a haircut with the trimmer I bought him a few weeks ago. Just a buzz and I shaped up his neck. His head injury must be pretty bad because he said I could cut his hair all the time now.
Then we wandered over to the day room to play a few hands of Uno. It felt great to sit with him and do something that we normally like to do. Bob said “I just miss being with you all the time. You’re my best friend and I just miss you”. He also continues to tell me how much better than him I am. And how proud he is of me. And that he made a good choice when he decided to marry me. I really need to start recording these conversations.
Back to Uno…first game, he beat me. Not as in “I let him win because he has TBI”. Nope. Legitimately. HE BEAT ME. Kinda crushed my spirit a little. So the next game I hit him with a double “draw 2” combo followed by a “draw 4 wild”. I won that hand and he described my playing style as “ruthless”. Yep. I am.
Crushing me with his final discard.
OT with Brian was good. Bob worked on standing up, sitting down, scooting, and had the second part of his vision test. He is doing well in OT and may soon progress to a different type of wheelchair so that he can propel himself. I started to doze off again, but I didn’t get caught this time.
Bob called me a half dozen times tonight and I almost lost it one of the times. I was taking both boys to Target to buy Bob some more gym type shorts as well as a few toiletries. God bless Brittany for meeting me there. But as Bob and I talked on the way home, the baby was crying and Michael had a fire truck that is so loud I always think I’m about to be pulled over. And it was just too much. And I’m tired. I’m always tired. Because even when I “take some time for me” there are things to do. A Progressive phone call to discuss his benefits with the insurance claim. That are only coming after 6 hours of leg work on my part. A phone call from the baby’s law guardian because court is Monday and maybe she should come and see him tomorrow for a report. (old Karen would have been blowing her phone up and demanding a visit for the last month). Nothing like the last minute. “Nah, we don’t have plans. Come when it’s convenient for you.” While I’m trying to book the hotel for the weekend to take Mikey up to see Bob and surprise him with longer visits than normal. And I have to go to the pediatrician to pick up paperwork for a meeting on Monday afternoon for tiny baby. And pack. And wash Bob’s clothes. And I have the beginning of a stye. So Bob’s phone calls to sing my praises in the middle of a baby meltdown we’re not received well.
But what broke my heart tonight was Michael really breaking down and crying for his Dada. Real tears. Nearly inconsolable. Until Joey gave him a tiny rock em sock em robot. It was the saddest I’ve seen Mikey in a long time. We’ll see dada this weekend and be able to play with him upstairs and outside.
I also want to thank Alyssa and Brent. Today was my last time seeing them because they are both graduating over the next week. You are both already amazing therapists and will excel wherever you are employed. You will both continue to make a difference in people’s lives as you have made a difference in my family. Bob always says incredible things about you both and tells me how you are willing to try anything he asks. We will both miss you.
Please keep praying for a miracle. We need it. Bob needs it. If you ever want to call and talk to him, send me a message or email and I will give you his number. Thank you all for your love and support.